Okay, so over the past few weeks, I have done some hard thinking about things....
I know, me thinking is a scary thought for some of you, but in this case it's a good thing!
So... I have kinda been a real 'Negative Nancy' ever since my wreck.
(For those of you who don't know- I was in a pretty serious hit and run accident on Friday Feb.26th. I was in the parking lot of Michael's and Ulta @ 71st and Garnett. I was turning left into a row of parking spots when I was t-boned, on the drivers side, by a teenager driver. He was going between 30mph and 40mph IN A PARKING LOT when he hit me. Then shortly after the wreck he fled the area.)
I was so scared, frazzled, shaken up, confused, dizzy, and not to mention just flat out pissed off right after the accident happened-- I didn't have a chance to look at my car until a few days later. When I saw it, I nearly broke down in tears. It really made what happened "come to life" for me... as if the police, firemen, an ambulance ride, and a lovely hospital visit weren't enough...
I have been told countless times, my countless people, how lucky I am that he hit me right on the 'support bar' between my doors and not a
few inches forward. This has really made me think about how truly lucky I am to be alive and all the thing I have to be thankful for that I so often over look.
I have tried not to take things for granted anymore. This is harder to do than I thought it would be... I have really realized all I have to be thankful for, not that I didn't before, but it's now in a new light for me.
I have so much more thankfulness in my heart for my wonderful family and friends. I am a much more cautious person, in general and driving. I am allow/making myself do new things! I am learning once again to take life one day at a time, and really trying to "live each day like its my last". I'm trying oh so hard to trust the Lord with
EVERYTHING that I am and that I have. This of all things has been then hardest for me. I think it's mainly do to the fact that I am so strong willed (ha ha!) It's hard to relearn to let go control of your life and give it to Him, because He truly knows whats best for me.
I am also trying not the let the fear, of another wreck and driving, consume my thoughts. I have never really been scared to drive until now. I'm pretty sure that when most of you have said "are you scared to drive?" I've said no... and honestly- that's a lie. I just didn't want to admit that
I was scared to get behind the wheel again. It's not because I of my own driving... it's because of the other people on the road and the uncertainty of what can happen literally in the blink of an eye. I am trying to get over this by driving as much I can/need to... But let me tell you...
PARKING LOTS NOW SCARE THE CRAP OUT OF ME.... I know that sounds dumb, but it's the truth. I think people now saw "come on Grandma" to ME in parking lots. 'Cause I drive like -5mph and look and look again before I make any turns. (I know, I'm a dork!)
I would like to ask one thing of you... Would you please pray along side me and for me as I am relearning to let the Lord have control over my life and that His will, not my own will be done in my life?
Below are some picture of my car after the wreck....
Sorry they aren't that good, they were taking on a cell phone
Keep in mind... this damage happened IN A PARKING LOT....